Dear Dr Cath
MY wife has been having orgies flexible light behind my back. And I'm worried she may have given me something.
We have been married for 12 years. I thought we had the perfect relationship and our sex life is good.
But last week I found a hotel bill which must have fallen out of her handbag. I challenged her about it and she admitted that she's been meeting up with other men and women for group sex.
She said she was happy I'd found out because she felt guilty keeping secrets - and wants me to join in. I don't like the idea, but want to save our marriage.
I'm also worried about the infections she might have picked up. She says the men used condoms but I don't trust her. Please can you help.
SWINGING was a big thing in the Seventies and has been making a comeback. In a recent survey one in six people in the UK said they had enjoyed group sex. Usually this involves three in a bed, but many have gone much further.
Group sex isn't new - look what the Romans got up to. But with the internet it's now very easy to find websites of likeminded people.
It may seem hedonistic and fun but it must have been a huge shock for you to find out what your wife has been doing.
It's hard enough to hear that your wife has been sleeping with other people, but there is ed hardy clothing also her deceit in sneaking off behind your back. Little wonder that you don't trust her over the condom issue.
But at least she's not just having an affair. You may wonder how swinging could be any better than her having a single lover. Well, group sex is usually just about physical pleasure. There's not much emotion involved, other than lust.
She's been physically unfaithful but may not have been emotionally. Despite her lies your wife still loves you, so much so she wants you to join in.
If joining the swinging scene isn't something you're interested in then your wife should respect that. Instead you need to both be honest about your relationship and find a compromise together that works. This could be
embroidered patches looking at other ways to get a bit of excitement back into your sex life.
If you're worried about sexually-transmitted infections then don't be afraid to go to your local sexual health clinic to put your mind at rest.
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